ONLINE LOVE?

By Bob Sullivan
Technology correspondent
MSNBC
Richie's picture showed a jolly, bearded
man curled up on a couch with a cat
rubbing his face. "Loving, caring and
hardworking," the online dating profile said.

When Theresa Smalley received a note from
Richie last January asking if she wanted to
chat, she was flattered. He seemed cute.
The two began exchanging e-mails,
friendly at first, but quickly swelling in
intensity and passion. By Valentine's Day,
Smalley received a box of chocolate candy,
a teddy bear, and a helium balloon that said
"I love you." Smalley, 46, was hooked,
even though she had never met him.
Richie said he was from Milford, Mass.,
but that he was out of the country on a
big construction job. He was helping
build a stadium in Nigeria, he said.
As soon as he returned, he promised,
he'd come visit Smalley in Ohio. He
couldn't wait, and neither could she.
The spirited e-mail romance hummed
along for another two months before
there was a problem. Richie said his boss
paid him in postal money orders, and he
was having trouble cashing them. Could
Theresa do a small favor for him? Could
she cash the money order for him, then
wire the money to him in Nigeria? Smalley
agreed, and over the next two weeks, she
cashed two $900 money orders and sent
along
Then, Smalley's bank called her.
Something was wrong.
"I had to call a special number at the bank.
Even up until that point I still believed him.
I had no qualms whatsoever cashing
(the money orders)," Smalley said. Even after
the bank told her the money orders had been
altered — they were purchased for $20,
but then "washed" and doctored to read $900
— she still held out hope. But a friend
pointed her to an Internet site devoted to
Nigerian scams, and suddenly, Smalley's
world crashed down around her.
'My whole world had fallen apart'"The bank
told me I was responsible for that money.
I had to pay them $2,700, which was
everything I had," she said. "I was
devastated. I felt like my whole world
had fallen apart.
Smalley shared her version of events with
MSNBC.com in the hopes that others might
not fall for the same trickery.
"Never in my wildest dreams would I have
ever known that this is all a part of an elaborate
online scam. He spent four months gaining my
trust and he did it."
So-called Nigerian scams, where victims are
ultimately tricked into sending money to the
African country using some irreversible
method like a wire transfer, are common.
The Secret Service and other U.S. agencies
have issued warnings on the scams, also known
as "419" or "advance-fee" frauds. But the
seductive flavor of this type of the scam —
known to some as "sweetheart scams" —
and the incredible patience shown by the
scammer reveal just how far con artists will
go to trick their marks.
Ryan W. of Washington state, who asked
that his last name be withheld, says he sent
$15,200 to a similarly seductive scammer.
And he wasn't even using an online dating service.
Ryan was approached while hanging out in a
chat room devoted to Grateful Dead fans.
His seducer also claimed to be an American
out of the country getting paid via money order,
and also ultimately asked him to cash them.
Five weeks later, when the bank came
calling, all $11,000 in Ryan's bank account
— most of it from a student loan
earmarked for next semester's tuition
— was frozen by his bank.
"Typically people go on the Net to get dates.
I was just on there trading music," he said.
"The thing that duped me was the whole
music issue. She seemed to be into the
music I was into."
Flowers bought with stolen credit cards
Nigerian-based con artists seem to have
seized on sweetheart scams of late, said
Dale Miskell, supervisory special agent in
charge of an FBI cybercrime squad in
Birmingham, Ala. Scam artists post ads to
online dating sites and lurk in chat rooms with
names like "40 and single," or "Recently
dumped." Often, they reach out to a lonely
soul with flowers or candy, purchased with a
stolen credit card.
"A little gift of flowers or candy is a good
aphrodisiac," said Miskell. "The next thing
you know, they are in love. I can't tell you
the number of women who have fallen for
this."
There have been so many victims that they
are starting to find each other online. A new
Yahoo group, "RomanceScams," was
founded last month by Smalley and
Barb Sluppick, who said she almost fell for
a similar scam earlier this year. Among the
hundreds of messages posted to the group
are photographs of alleged scammers, links
to potentially fraudulent online dating ads,
and copies of come-on e-mails. The group
is trying to publicize the problem to limit
the damage.
"How many people are out there thinking
they found the love of their life and they
have no clue what's happening?" Sluppick
said. "The first thing most people say to
me when they contact me is, 'I can't believe
I was so stupid.' "
Sweetheart scams appear to be on the rise,
said Julie Ferguson, executive director of the
Merchant Risk Council, which tracks scams
for online retailers.
"I am definitely getting more calls on this.
I used to get one every three months.
Now, I get one every couple of weeks
or so because it's the easiest way to get
somebody hooked," Ferguson said.
"The stories are so-gut-wrenching sad."
Some scammers seem to deliberately target
groups set up for Christian singles, she said,
where people may be less likely to be
suspicious. "When you are meeting
someone else on a Christian site, you think
you are safe."
No dating site is immune from scams, said
Jason Tarlowe, who operates
MatchDoctor.com, where Smalley met Richie.
"This hurts our business. We don't want this,"
Tarlowe said. "We're trying to do everything
possible ... We don't want people to be taken in."
But they are, said Donna Gregory, supervisory
internet crime specialist at the FBI's Internet
Fraud Complaint Center. She said the con
artists are relentless.
"We've even seen them take as long as a year
(to seduce a mark)," Gregory said. Con artists
will hunt for people's weaknesses, find out
what they care about -- such as Grateful
Dead music -- and then go in for the kill.
Sometimes, the online suitors don't even ask
before sending money orders. They just send
them, then guilt their targets into forwarding
on the cash, Gregory said. In other cases,
the con artists aren't after money -- they are
after shipping help. They ask their
correspondents to "re-ship" items to locations
in Nigeria. The goods are often purchased
with stolen credit cards, but the con artists
have trouble getting them delivered out
of the country, because many U.S. merchants
are now wary of shipping to Nigeria.
So the criminals need a middle-man.
"They say, 'Oh, once you have them, why
not just send them? People say, 'I've got these
packages and I don't know why,'" Gregory said.
Sluppick said one confused victim in her
Yahoo support group currently has about
$50,000 in merchandise that's been sent to
her home, and she doesn't know what to do with it.
The Merchant Risk Council's Ferguson said
victims can always contact her agency for help
returning merchandise to the retailers.
'Keep your money to yourself'But there is no
returning money to consumers who have
wired funds overseas, hoping to cement a
love bond. Smalley said other would-be
victims need to know about the perils of
online matchmaking, and they need to listen
to the little voices of hesitation and concern
inside that she failed to heed.
"So much came back to me after all of this
was done," she said. "I sat there thinking about
everything. But these guys are professionals.
They have the time. They have the patience."
Rhoda Cook has for years operated a Web
site named straightshooter.net which maintains
a database of sweetheart con artists. She's
seen many varieties of romance scams, online
and off. There's nothing new about charming
men and women swindling would-be lovers,
she said.
"When they invented the car, the con artist
could drive to the next county. Now they can
get on the Internet and go across the world,"
Cook said. "When you meet someone and
you really want someone you just want to
believe them."
Her advice to daters is the same, online or
off:
"Enjoy the relationship, but keep your money
to yourself," she said. "That way, if it goes
wrong, all you're going to lose is your heart."
© 2005 MSNBC Interactive